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I Read These:
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Who ARE these people?
| 2002-06-22 - 11:53 p.m.
Premature optimism
Once again, I want to be dead. I THOUGHT I was having a good day. Then around 7, I started getting a little queasy, which I attributed to too many pain meds and not enough food. Had some soup, and skipped some meds. Went to bed around 9:30. Awoke at 11 in the most intense pain. I swear, it is like day 1 all over again. Took pill and am waiting for it to kick in. I went downstairs and started sobbing. I can't deal with this any more. I can't stand the disgusting taste in my mouth, the pain, the stitches...any of it. What the FUCK kind of sadist did this to me? I swear to you, if I ever see that man in the street, I WILL run him over with my car, and when he complains of pain, I will tell him "yeah, two broken legs will hurt for a few days. You'll be fine. Get out of my way". God had better not ever strike me down with some kind of chronic severe pain thing, because I won't make it. I'll take the entire bottle of pain pills and leave this mortal coil. This is fucking bullshit. Kill me now. Seriously. Hit me with a big ol' mallet. sob
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